About this ebook
Transition into the ethereal realm of Indie Author Nelson Colón, where shadows and redemption entwine in a divine dance. Delving into his mad memoirs, he transcends the mundane, plunging you into an alternate dimension brushed with strokes of pain, addiction, and unwavering hope. Nelson's journey unfolds with raw, gut-wrenching emotion—a childhood scarred by searing abuse; the deafening void left by an absent father; relentless encounters with bullies, gangs, and malevolent entities haunting his every step. Traverse the intricate labyrinth of Nelson's life as he grapples with the depths of low self-worth, succumbing to the tumultuous currents of drugs, alcohol, and toxic relationships, all the while seeking solace in the elusive promises of the occult.
Embark on an extraordinary odyssey that not only challenges and captivates, but also unveils the indomitable intrinsic spirit within. In the crucible of despair, a resilient flame emerges, transforming this narrative into a lyrical symphony that resonates with the deepest chords of the soul. Beyond the confines of a mere memoir, it calls forth the very essence of the heart to confront inner demons, shatter societal constraints, and launch into a transformative journey toward inner healing and spiritual liberation—a memoir so mesmerizing, it will linger in your thoughts long after the final word.
Nelson Colón, a native New Yorker, launches his autobiographical masterpiece, intricately navigating the challenges of his early life. Probing into personal journals, Colón grants readers an intimate peek into his tumultuous upbringing against the vibrant backdrop of New York City during the political upheaval of the 1960s and 70s. Elevating his narrative, supernatural encounters and an epiphany during his service in the Navy add an additional layer of depth to his remarkable story, making it an unparalleled exploration of resilience, redemption, and the regenerative human spirit.
{Approximately 200 pgs.}
NELSON COLÓN
Accolades to my firstborn Nethaniel Nelson, who teaches English and Humanities at Cambria Heights Academy High School in Hollis Queens, NY. Thank you, son, for assisting me in this labor of love, and helping to mold my story for God’s glory. We’ve laughed, cried, and bonded more closely together in the undertaking of this endeavor. I appreciate you “Showing” my story and helping my narrative come to life. I am truly thankful and so proud of you … You have grown to become the man of valor, loving husband, and faithful father that I have always tried to envision myself to be. Nelson Colón
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Transition - NELSON COLÓN
Foreword
A person in a suit Description automatically generated with medium confidenceBy Nethaniel Nelson Colón
In July 1997, at the age of 13, I deboarded a JetBlue airliner at Orlando International Airport to greet a father I had yet to know. A hug, a handshake, or a smile seemed inappropriate to me, so I greeted him with a wave. It was the first time I would spend time with a father and get to know him truly. I didn’t know it then, but it would be the start of a journey, a life-long life-changing relationship. I did not yet know his story, his journey, his peaks, and his valleys. Nor did I understand why he wasn’t present during my early childhood, but what I did know is that he loved me and that I could get to know him if I so chose.
The Bible tells the story of Joseph, his trust betrayed by his older brothers. When he had an opportunity to seek vengeance, he instead reassured them that what they did to harm him, God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done.
{Genesis 50: 20}
This book is what is now being done.
It is the product of decades of tears, smiles, joys, hopes, hurts, and healing. I hope it finds you at a point in your life where life weighs heavily when it’s hard to see the purpose in pain. What many people think is intended to kill them is the very thing that God will use to save them. I pray this book would be a conduit for hope and change in your own life as it chronicles the hope and change that is pervasive in my father’s life.
A picture containing text, human face, person, screenshot Description automatically generatedAccolades to my firstborn Nethaniel Nelson, who teaches English and Humanities at Cambria Heights Academy High School in Hollis Queens, NY.
Thank you, son, for assisting me in this labor of love, and helping to hone my story for God’s glory. We’ve laughed, cried, and bonded more closely together in the undertaking of this endeavor. Appreciate you Showing
my story and helping my narrative come to life.
I am genuinely thankful and incredibly proud of you. You’ve grown into the man of valor, loving husband, and faithful father that I have always aspired to be. Forgive me, where I may have fallen short, but you are the first arrow in my quiver, and you have already exceeded my expectations in hitting the mark. I love you son. May our Heavenly Father continue to bless and use you mightily for His glory.
Introduction
Birth & Rebirth
The last phase of the first stage of labor is imminent with cervical dilation of 8 to 10 CM. Medical experts claim that this is the most painful process as the baby has positioned itself in the birth canal of the mother and is beginning to crown and push itself through to be birthed.
In comparison, our lives are inundated with traumatic events; pain can be the one constant in our lives that we come to expect and even count on. I share my story asking that you take heart in knowing that as we are being prepared and positioned for that last transitioning phase, as we near the end of the labor process, at the end of that dark tunnel, is a magnificent blinding light, and a great release when you are born and reborn.
Transition should lead upward toward Transcension. Transcendent prayer can lead toward Transformation. Transformation in Christ, in turn, leads toward Transfiguration.
In this spiritual journey from transition to transcension, we are invited to embrace the transformative power of prayer, allowing it to lead us toward a more profound and lasting change in our lives. Through our union with Christ, we can eventually experience the epitome and embodiment of transfiguration. Which brings us closer to our true nature and purpose, reflecting the divine image in which we were initially created for. It is my prayer that the vivid images of my story will stay with you and that my testimony will assist you on the personal road that you too must travel to reach your own ultimate spiritual destination.
Chapter One
Rosebud
The name that tumbled from the lips of a dying Orson Welles in Citizen Kane,* to this day holds an especially poignant meaning for me. For Welles, that one word illustrated how all the riches that he had amassed as a wealthy newspaper publisher had never brought him happiness. No, his inner hopes and dreams resided in the childhood sled that was carelessly tossed into a fire. For him, this was the death of innocence and the carefree childhood that brought him a joy he could never quite recapture. Although a sled was at the heart of that 1941 Academy Award-winning movie, my Rosebud was a red tricycle. Many people find it hard to recall much before the age of four or five, but I remember it as if a recent dream, as a three-year-old, — anxiously awaiting sunrise.
* Credit to Ken Walker (Freelance Writer / Charisma Magazine) for editing this initial intro. Thanks Ken!
I would wake before the sun and await the cock’s crow. By 5 am, streaks of light would break the night sky. That was my signal, I would soon be free to ride. My two tricycles weren’t kept in the house. I tried that once and received a swift slap from my mother's chancleta. [1] I kept them by the marquesina[2] at the top of our driveway. Marquesinas were usually used to store a car or hang a hammock and host visitors; I remember the neighbors using them for such. For us, it had long lost its original purpose. It had become somewhat crowded; its contents were rust-worn blue coal grill with one leg missing, a spotted mattress laid against its back post, several dented toolboxes spilling over with wrenches, nuts, and bolts strewn upon the concrete floor, painted over gray so many times I’m sure my father lost count.
With the sky still purple black, I would stand there staring at my trikes. One was red with a cold metallic seat and the other a black rusted color with a vinyl seat. I found the black one appealing because it was a big boys
trike. It was taller with longer, higher handlebars. It was a smoother ride because my dad had oiled the wheels recently, but the thought of my arms aching from reaching up to grasp the bars all day made me default to my red trike. I used to tell my mom that I wasn’t too big for it, but the truth was I didn’t want to be rid of it because the color made me go faster. A rooster has a way of instinctively knowing when the first bit of red and orange is going to appear amidst the horizon. As soon as he commenced crowing his Wake-Up
call, I was off to the races. I threw my leg over the trike, checked the front wheel spokes for my Topps Mickey Mantle and rolled down the driveway. I couldn’t peddle just yet; the sound of the rusty petals might alert my parents, but once I was on the street, I was free to pick up speed and pedal hard. I would push as hard as I could and try not to fidget out of fear the seat might squeak. My mother later told me that I was the talk of the town, There’s that Cotto kid on his rusty bike again
they’d say, Coño, his father can’t oil that damn seat?
They didn’t have disposable pampers then; they were cloth diapers that my mother would have to wash by hand. I don’t think there was any Downy then, so maybe the diapers felt rough and uncomfortable, or maybe I just didn’t like feeling constricted. Whatever the reason, I couldn’t leave my diapers on for too long. I would ride butt-naked, donning only my dingy white toddler t-shirt. The metal seat would eventually cook under the tropical sun, burning my bare behind. The downhill breeze was soothing; it caressed my naked body with friendly warmth. Coasting down each hill was glorious; a more than adequate reward for the effort it took to climb one. A warm wind was blowing my hair back. The only thing I had to remember was to keep my mouth closed while speeding downward. It was nasty when you got a mouth full of gnats. My calves would cramp as I pedaled my way uphill. Sweat built across my forehead and would soak my eyebrows. It was only a matter of time until it would drip into my eye. This was my motivation. I would push hard to the top of each hill before a bead of sweat would sting my eye. Sometimes I would beat it, other times I wasn’t so fortunate and had to ride with one eye closed for a while, cringing as I passed by the early risers.
I could see some people in their windows turning on their lights and putting their dented metal coffee pots on their grease-stained stoves. The air smelled of fresh coffee and boiled milk. Round and round I’d go. There were only about ten houses on my street. I would ride to the end of the street and turn back, passing my house as fast as possible, hoping to impress Mami. At times, I remember stopping at the end of the street and pulling my trike into the grass to get a view of the valley, and the town of Machuelo in the distance. My home was at the top of a mountain, or maybe it was just a big hill, but to me, it was like looking down from Machu Picchu. I would realize how minuscule the town beneath me was. I claimed ownership; Ponce and Machuelito were mine.
A group of children sitting on grass Description automatically generatedMy trikes would occupy my entire day, but I would make sure to stop by the house to watch for Papi
to leave in the late morning. I was afraid he would make me come back in, so I would park across the street. Usually, my older brother, Cano, at eight years of age, would sit idly in the marquesina as if he didn’t have to get ready for school, watching the streets for his friends. Lillian was the oldest, an official teenager at thirteen, and operated more like a mother than an older sister, scrambling to prepare lunch for everyone. Even my father looked and yelled at her in a similar fashion to our Mom. At nine years old, Veronica never seemed to wake early enough to see him leave, closed in her room. But not me, I liked watching as he drove off in his black ‘55 Chevy. The red interior was so torn you could see patches of yellow scattered throughout. If he saw me, I was sure to wave. Sometimes I was acknowledged when he motioned his cigarette at me. Once he left, there wasn’t much that helped me distinguish how much time went by. I stayed out all day. My mother would call me to give me some water and bread. She would put my diaper back on, but that only lasted one trip down the street. The sun would start to set, and a cool breeze would start to speak through the trees.
That is when I started recognizing Papi' s distinct style of yelling, Mira, este muchacho está afuera enud, Carajo!
[3] When I heard those words I would pull into the driveway, dump my trike amongst the tools, and go back into the house. Mami would find me and address my nakedness, but my relentless yearning to feel free and unconstricted would eventually outwit Mami’s distinctiveness for overprotection.
One incident that took place during this same period of my life that further added to my emotional instability was when I almost had myself castrated. * In the re-enactment of Mister Magoo, opening my mother’s umbrella, and attempting to use it as a parachute, I jumped off the bed and yelled out, Mister Magoo!
When my genitalia got caught and slashed by a sharp hardened piece of torn vinyl jetting out of the upholstery of an old chair right by my mother’s bed. Lillian was cleaning the metal window blinds in my mother’s bedroom and was utilizing the kitchen chair to stand on. It happened so quickly I didn’t even feel the pain until I looked down and saw my young manhood hanging from a thread of vein and flesh. For the fear of getting a spanking, I didn’t even yell. I just gently cupped it with my hands. I walked about the house that way, for a while, without anyone noticing what had happened to me. I must have been in some sort of shock. Incredibly, I faintly recall contemplating whether I should finish ripping off the remaining piece, put on a band-aid, and just hope that my mother wouldn’t notice. At that instant, my brother Cano saw me, and let out a yell, MAMI!
My mother came running, and when she saw blood oozing out through my little fingers, holding on to my private parts, she topped my brother’s yell with a shrill scream straight out of a horror movie. Wrapping me up in a towel and an old quilt, she picked me up and ran hysterically out of the house. Desperately looking for someone to help get me to the hospital, she finally convinced a neighbor of the urgency, who then took us in his car.
Thank GOD, they got me to the hospital in time to save my jewels as well as the future Colón family. Blessed with two normal healthy sons. Well, three. Nehemiah Nelson who was stillborn, graduated heaven-bound, getting his wings prematurely, being spared the traumas and testings of this life.
* In Hindsight, the devil tried to rob me of my bloodline, but God began training me even then, when I was totally oblivious to Him, that No Weapon formed against me would prosper.
Even during my birth, the devil, who comes only to rob, kill, and destroy, tried to end my life. My mother who experienced many difficulties during labor almost lost me, not to mention almost lost her life, ushering me into this purgatory
.
Looking back, my three-wheelers represented much more than fun and recreation. Three years later I missed those days in Puerto Rico. I was six years old and found myself in Brooklyn. The house we came to live in belonged to my Titi[4] Gladys, my mother’s sole younger sister. She was beautiful; fair with the striking contrast