Jack and the Magical Beanstalk

Dedication

To those who aspire to overcome an inferior self-image with awkward but redeeming efforts.

Jack and the Magical Beanstalk

Once upon a time, there was a poor widow named Lorene who lived on a reclusive, neglected farm with her frail son, Jack, and their dairy cow, Pearly White, a prime Guernsey. They also had several other milking cows which were Pearly White’s offspring. The poor widow raised Jack the best she knew how. They survived by selling milk at a distant farmer’s market each day to buy small amounts of food. While her handsome, masculine husband, Bill, was alive, she had been a real beauty. Bill, a strong six foot two man, had managed the crops without any help.

Bill and Lorene met at the county fair after a couple of rowdy, uncouth men made crude comments to Lorene regarding her beauty. Bill stepped in, discouraging any further catcalls. Excuse me, Miss, are these men bothering you? He had asked.

I don’t appreciate what they have been saying, it’s true. Lorene blushed at their vulgar behavior.

Okay, you cowards, it’s time you’re on your way if you know what’s good for you.

The men immediately fled. Bill’s tall stature, muscular build, and commanding baritone voice left no room for argument.

How can I repay you? Lorene smiled at Bill. May I offer you one of my pies? She had entered her award-winning pies in the county competition.

You needn’t repay me, Miss. Any gentleman would treat a beautiful young woman such as you with respect.

Lorene not only gave him one of her blue ribbon peach pies but invited him for Sunday dinner. During their brief courtship, Bill wooed Lorene with beautiful love songs, serenading her with his smooth, baritone voice. They married that November.

They started their farm with a prize milking cow, Pearly White, and planted crops. Bill bred Pearly White over the years, her offspring providing more milk. In the evenings after they had eaten dinner, Bill would sing songs of love to his wife. Afterward they would make passionate love. Two years later, Lorene gave birth to their son, Jack.

Bill’s son brought a sparkle to his eyes. When Jack was three, he began taking him along while doing the farm chores. Jack idolized his parents, drawing pictures of them. For such a young boy, he was quite talented. His parents encouraged him to pursue his art, allowing him to draw and paint whenever and wherever he desired.

Bill died when Jack was only five. He was struck by a lightning bolt during a severe thunderstorm while trying to bridal his horse and fetch Pearly White after she broke through a fence and ran off in fear. Jack remembered that day vividly. He had not feared the continuous lightning flashes, the loud booming thunder, or the rising water of the ensuing flash flood. He feared only the expression on his mother’s face when they found his father, his body singed from the heat of the lightning. His eyes were open, frozen with the undeniable pain. His mother’s face had always radiated peace and serenity, until that moment. She screamed with rage at the heavens above. Never seeing his mother like this before, Jack grasped hold of her leg through her rain-soaked dress and held onto her. Momentarily, the widow realized Jack was hanging onto her and picked up her son, squeezed him tightly, and cried uncontrollably. Even as a child, Jack understood the gravity of his father’s death, knowing he would never talk to or hold him again; he was gone forever.

After her husband’s death, the young widow not only looked older than her years but was also haggard from toiling on the farm with Jack, planting crops that continuously failed, and going to market to sell the milk each day. Jack had inherited his father’s sense of humor and good looks; beautiful blue eyes, clear, like the sky after a blustery storm, auburn hair, soft and feathery to the touch, milky skin, a pleasing smile, and a sturdy frame. Unfortunately, as a teenager, he was still awkward and gangly. Each day at the market, when the poor widow and Jack sold their milk, the townsfolk laughed at Jack, calling him a wimp. The boys in town teased and bullied him, but he tried not to let it bother him. Jack was very talented, often reciting stories he had imagined, soothing the poor widow’s sorrows. Jack painted beautiful pictures of his father, reminding Lorene of her husband. One picture, the widow blushed over but fancied, was her husband naked, his muscular body glistening, and his large penis fully erect. Jack had another talent; he arranged their meager belongings and furniture to make the house appear more like a rich man’s home. One talent Jack lacked, however, was his father’s beautiful voice. He wrote beautiful lyrics but couldn’t sing the range of notes his father had.

As a teenager, Jack had frequently asked his mother questions concerning his father since he had died when Jack was only five. Although the poor widow’s eyes welled with tears, she