From the outside looking in, my life is perfect. I’ve made it all the way from Sweden to the USA to be a star player for the Arizona Rattlesnakes NHL team and we’re having our best season ever. The problem is… I can’t take the heat. Literally. I need to get out of the desert as fast as possible.

I have a plan and it’s simple: remain detached from my life, as Tucson is just a pit stop, and when we win the Cup, I’ll get myself traded to any other team in a colder climate. My teammates think I’m a grumpy bastard but that’s just my way of keeping them at arm’s length, so I don’t miss them too much when I bolt.

I’ve hit another snag in the form of my new next-door neighbor. Elizabeth’s a ray of jävlasunshine—and we know how I feel about the sun—and she can’t seem to take the hint that I want her gone. My stand-offish nature doesn’t seem to stop her from baking me muffins, doing my yard work, and generally driving me insane with her curves as she prances around in yoga outfits and lounges in her bikini by the pool.

I need to resist, but every minute I spend with Elizabeth and her three-legged dog makes it harder and harder to remember why I can’t just let myself go and enjoy her warmth. She may be the best thing that’s ever happened to a grumpy bastard like me, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to let the sexy, taco-loving temptress lure me into staying in Helvete, or Hell.

If I stick to my plan I’ll be happy…right? But what if I’m wrong?

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