Bullies and Soggy Soup Bones

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About the author

Woelf Dietrich

As a kid he consumed books and comics by the truckloads, reading anything from fantasy to westerns to science fiction. He wrote his first short story at 12 and soon began creating his own comic books, drawing little stick figures with dialogue balloons that later evolved into musclebound warriors and scantly clad vixens. He gave them battle axes and broadswords and unleashed them onto the world. A silent chaos ensued followed by crickets chirping and nothing much else. Alas, life kept interfering and he allowed it, and so nothing came from his artistic endeavours.

After graduating high school he served a year in the military where he learned how to dig trenches, eat quickly, and miss girls. He then travelled to Israel and lived on a Kibbutz for eight months, working in avocado fields and drinking cheap vodka. For a while there he sold pots and pans and educational toys in Africa and almost got shot in Zimbabwe. He did a brief stint as a cartoonist somewhere and an even briefer stint as reporter somewhere else. Somehow, and maybe by accident, he ended up in law school and became a lawyer. He did that for almost a decade.

These days he's back to writing stories. A calling he ignored for far too long. He lives in New Zealand now, and with a wife and kids, and a dog, he is staying put for the foreseeable future.