The Trembling Tear: Songs of the Inner Voice

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About the author

I Gargatholil

Gargatholil's interest in astrology began in the early 1970s when he discovered Dane Rudhyar and Alan Leo.  Further exploring the field in the 1980s, Gargatholil read Stephen Arroyo, Diane Cunningham and Liz Greene.  Predisposed to transcendent metaphysics since their teens, Gargatholil quickly gravitated to depth astrology, viewing astrology as a tool for personal growth and a deeper understanding of the self inhabiting the personality of this lifetime.  In the early 1990s, Gargatholil realized that there were no standard manuals of the meanings of astrological symbols written from a depth astrology approach.  They then decided to provide one.  Having substantially completed a multi-year spurt of poetry composition, reprising a passion of their high school years (the genesis of The Trembling Tear​​​​​​​), Gargatholil began the project of composing the four-volume work, Depth Astrology: An Astrological Handbook.  Working on their lunch hour while holding their straight job, Gargatholil took ten years to complete the manuscript.  However, they found no publisher willing to print the book and, so, decided to generate an audience by creating a website ( and uploading the manuscript, chapter by chapter.  This, in itself, took a number of years. 

By 2010, the site had thousands of views per month and, as the site approached full construction, Gargatholil heard about e-publishing.  Immediately recognizing the overwhelming advantages for the author over the standard book publisher route, Gargatholil began converting the html pages of their website into a format that could be published as an e-book.  This process was finally completed in 2014 and published (via a D2D competitor).  The book quickly reached the $2,000 sale threshold to appear on Amazon.  Altogether, Depth Astrology has sold more than 1,800 copies worldwide.  

After publishing Depth Astrology, Gargatholil began work on Sign-to-Sign Dynamics: A Depth Astrology Approach.  By this time, Gargatholil had left their job in municipal government and was successfully consulting in their field.  They decided to use the Depth Astrology website again to pre-publish the chapters in this book, loading one chapter per month over a 6 1/2 year period.  This book was published in March, 2021,

Gargatholil has Sun in Libra, a Taurus Ascendant and a Capricorn cusp Aquarius Moon.  Resonating to this cusp, the Moon is the Finger point of a Yadh involving Saturn (Capricorn's ruler) and Uranus (Aquarius' ruler).  Their ruling planets, Venus and Saturn, are also conjunct.  Gargatholil's life has, thus, been challenged to balance and integrate the radical and Higher Mind energy of Uranus with the temperamentally conservative, physical-plane oriented energy of Saturn.  One manifestation of this configuration has been structuring their insights into the astrological symbol set to produce these books.  

Gargatholil is currently working on two other writing projects, which also demonstrate the power of the Yadh in their creative efforts.  One is a commentary on more than 800 songs released during the Countercultural years of the sixties.  This work, entitled The Pouring, is being edited.  Very challenging has been the intransigence of the music industry in demanding exhorbitant fees for the use of any portion of a song lyric.  Except for the permission of a few enlightened copyright holders, readers will need to independently reference the lyrics interpreted in this book.  

The other work, which will be published under the author's real name, is a professional manual describing, in detail, a new methodology developed by Gargatholil to conduct quantitative-qualitative analysis pertaining to a particular public policy decision (given the arcane nature of this area of analysis, I risk revealing my identity if I described this further, LoL).  

Gargatholil has other diverse writing projects in mind to keep them occupied well into retirement.