Bitterness and Rage.

These are the two emotions that rule my life. After I was hit by a drunk and high driver my life was never the same. The collision left my body broken like a rag doll. I lost my job, my savings, my whole life. My grandfather left me his patchwork home and I’ve been scrambling ever since to keep up with the mortgage any way I can. I rent out sections and play nice with the temporary tenants and tourists that breeze through my ancestral home. This latest group has been the hardest yet.

The rich tourist. The career military man. The bachelor businessman. The quiet handyman.

6 months and they’ll be gone. I never let anyone stay longer, but with my bills piling up and my doubts worsening, I may be forced to give them an extension. I don’t mind the quiet one, but the other three keep trying to get close. Do they think I’m stupid? That a pretty face or easily bought deeds will impress me? I need them to see that none of that matters. I’m not the person I was before. Those beautiful words only anger me, the kind actions only make me suspicious. I won’t let my heart or my mind be broken like my body. I won’t.

(This is a Hawaiian contemporary Why Choose/Reverse Harem, which centres around a Kanaka Maoli woman, facets of Modern Hawaiian Culture, and Medical Trauma.)

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